fun with titles #12

The Dance of Passion - You feel passion for this melodramatic, over-hyped, dry, and dull series all right... passion to fast-forward almost every scene!

Lethal Weapons of Love and Passion - Combining numerous "ratings poison" factors in this series made it indeed lethal to TVB's ratings.

Welcome To The House - It's more like welcome to the commercial house with this series - am I watching a sitcom or 20 minutes of advertisement?

To Grow With Love - Don't expect your mind to grow from this trashy nonsense. Conversely, the brain cells you will lose watching this is proportional to the fat cells that Myolie Wu gained for this series.

fun with titles #11

Safe Guards - TVB certainly didn't guard us from Elaine Yiu's numerous crying scenes! Perhaps no one's safe from the torture of that sight.

La Femme Desperado - If the femme is French and a woman, then why is her desperation Spanish and masculine?

Au Revoir Shanghai - Shanghai? It's more like au revoir this forgettable series!

Maidens' Vow - It's like it's TVB's vow to make Charmaine Sheh younger and younger as the years go by. Her characters and co-stars just keep getting younger.

fun with titles #10

To Get Unstuck In Time - I want to unstuck myself from the TV every time Flora Chan is on with her horrendous bangs and trying-too-hard role.

Placebo Cure - This series was definitely a placebo - totally had no effect whatsoever!

Where The Legend Begins - Ah, the legend of Sonija Kwok's bad acting began here!

Invisible Journey - The point of this series surely was as invisible as suggested. I guess I was too blind to see it.

fun with titles #9

The Battle Against Evil - Why fight evil? It's a constant battle trying to stay up watching this nonsense.

War of In-Laws - It's more like war of who can overact the most.

Trimming Success - If only Kevin Cheng and Sharon Chan could be trimmed from this series (and from TVB for that matter), then it wouldn't be so bad.

Fantasy Hotel - In a fantasy world, this series would indeed be fantastic - but we're in reality, aren't we?

fun with titles #8

Riches and Stitches - The riches of this series couldn't disguise the ridiculously stitched together storylines.

Lost In The Chamber of Love - I get lost wondering how TVB casted this series. Michelle Ye supporting Myolie Wu? Kenneth Ma as a royal emperor? Ron Ng as an intelligent scholar? Give me a break!

Split Second - Even a second of this series will bore you to tears.

To Catch The Uncatchable - The uncatchable is the point of this series's ending and alas, the viewer failed to catch it!

fun with titles #7

Scavenger's Paradise - It's no wonder why this series is crap - it is trash's paradise.

Hidden Treasures - Ah! TVB should have told us that the plot, point, and entertainment merit of this series were all hidden - I wouldn't have scratched my head wondering where they all were.

Not Just A Pretty Face - With this cast, you better believe there's no pretty face.

Ups and Downs In The Sea of Love - This series sure is ups and downs - from good to bad, from engaging to dragging... - maybe seasickness on the cast and crew caused this effect.

fun with titles #6

Food for Life - Wasn't yummy yummy satisfactory for an English title?

Let's Face It - Yes, let's face it, even with the cast and producer - this series sucks.

Golden Faith - Even with the golden cast, it takes a lot of faith to finish this series.

Real Kung Fu - The only thing that this series had to offer was the fact that it had real fung fu and TVB clearly wanted to get that message across in the simplest and most straight-forward title. Any other choice would have made the average viewer overlook the fact that this series had "real kung fu" to offer!

fun with titles #5

Doomed to Oblivion - This series was doomed to be unmemorable after Nnadia Chan's character died.

Revolving Doors of Vengeance - Around and around it goes... watching a revolving door is initially inticing, but the amusement quickly subsides - much like the series.

Strike At Heart - I'd rather be striked than to bear watching this series.

Whatever It Takes - TVB will do whatever it takes for this series to be successful. An excessive French kiss between Benny Chan and Tavia Yeung, a not scary man-in-lizard costume, fake and over-used computer graphics, and the legendary Empress Wu as a character - yup, TVB surely pulled out all of its weapons for this below A-list cast and under-budget series.

fun with titles #4

The Charm Beneath - How does TVB expect us to see the charm beneath when all the actresses have tons of make-up caked onto their faces? A bigger question is would we really want to see what's beneath the charm?

The Last Breakthrough - The only breakthrough from this series is that TVB managed to portray another race is a true light. But the fact that it's the "last" one makes me wonder whether it's back to racist jokes and stereotypes again...

Just Love - Is it really just love? I thought it was just Jessica Hsuan from the amount of screentime and focus on her.

At Point Blank - It's indeed point blank for this series. What's the point? Ah - it's blank. All this time I though the point was a void, but it turns out that TVB intended it to be blank!

fun with titles #3

The Academy - Is this academy a training school for future police cadets or wanna-be actors?

Return of the Cuckoo - Oh no! The cuckoo is returning. Is this a horror? Ah! Nancy Sit's freaky forehead mole and Charmaine Sheh with short hair - of course it's a scary series!

My Family - Yeah, I have a family too, so why should we care about yours? Hmm... maybe that's why I didn't care for this series.

Back To Square One - It should have been back to square one for the entire production team before this utterly senseless series was even filmed.

fun with titles #2

Into Thin Air - Yes, that's exactly where the plot of this series went... right into thin air.

Women On The Run - Just the women? What about the men?! The title should be "everyone on the run" - from this horrible series.

Life Made Simple - Life is indeed simple when you can resell in a new form and still be a winner, isn't that right, Roger Kwok?

Hard Fate - Oh, Flora Chan! It is indeed a hard fate for you as an actress when newcomer Niki Chow ends up delievering a better peformance than you.

fun with titles #1

We all know that TVB comes up with the most... peculiar English titles - some are plain cheesy while others are just bizarre. But, did you know that these very titles also reveal something about the series? It's true! The following is the first segment of a new multi-feature at TVB Musings. Having been recently bitten by the teeveebee bug again, the Fun With Titles feature is a satirical outlook on TVB's English titles.

Virtues of Harmony - The only harmony you're getting is when you turn off the TV and stop listening to all of the nonsensical bickering and petty arguments - which are the only things that this series has to offer.

Point of No Return - You bet there's no return after Damien Lau's character dies! It's all downhill from there...

Always Ready - I'm always ready to sleep when watching this series!

Summer Heat - Maybe the summer heat was to blame for this half-baked series with the ludicrous plot twist and "mystery."